Anyone else deal with this when it was time to part from your little one:
It sucks. It’s hard for them, it’s hard for you and I’m not going to lie about the fact that you’ll be tempted to never leave your kid with anyone ever again. Ash W and I have both gone through our fair share of crying kids when it is time to take a break. Her kids hated the daycare at the gym, my daughter hated the church nursery and my son hates being anywhere more than 3 inches away from my boobs (my life is over).
So how did we deal with our criers?
– Prep ’em. Don’t just let a sitter show up one day out of the blue. Don’t just expect to be able to drive up to their new preschool and push them out of the car. You have to make sure you talk up events like these. Make a babysitter kit with your kids of activities they’d like to do with their new sitter. Decorate a new tote bag for them to bring with them at daycare. Keep them involved in open houses for new schools and let them pick out their new backpacks and what they will wear on the first day. Talk, talk and talk some more about the upcoming event. Make it fun and exciting! Don’t make threats (bribes are OK!!) or “be mean” as my daughter would say.
– Don’t cry with them, they can smell fear. You have to lead by example Momma! If you are bawling like a baby on your kid’s first day of preschool, your kid is going to think preschool is a terrible place full of tears and broken toys. If you are positive and upbeat, your child will be as well. You have my permission to have a full blown sob fest in your car on the way home.
– Don’t be fooled by a fake crier. Sometimes you can tell, sometimes you can’t. My daughter deserves a freaking Academy Award for all the times she’s fooled me into thinking she’d be near death if I left her with a sitter. I would start to go and she’d sob and scream. I’d come back and my sitter would tell me that as soon as my car was out of site she all but shrugged her shoulders, muttered an “oh well” and get to playing. Stinker!
– Be supportive and make it about them. Make sure your child knows what is expected of them and know they will be in good hands. You could say something like “Mommy is going to go for a few hours and Miss Jane is going to play with you while I’m gone. Isn’t that nice of her to play with you? I will be back as soon as I have all my errands done so you don’t have to be bored with me”. I also found it helpful to tell my daughter what we would do together when I got back…something as simple as putting a favorite book to the side and telling her we would read it together when I got back.
Anyone else out there have a crier? How did/do you deal with it?