We’ve all been there.
Here are 10 things that I did this WEEK to make my kids hate me:
– I forgot my daughter (she’s 3) was in time out and left her there a liiiiiittle too long. Yep, I told myself I’d never do that and sure enough, she sat there for about 10 minutes while I was busy with her baby brother (4 months). Once I realized what I did, I jumped up and apologized for about another 10 minutes while I let her have a few Oreos. Now she wants me to forget about her every time.
– I lied to my daughter and told her McDonalds was out of sweet and sour sauce because I didn’t want her to have it in the car.
– I pretended not to hear my daughter when she told me she needed help going potty and then 3 hours later realized she pooped and needed my help cleaning up. Then I had to ignore my son’s cries as I did a quick load of laundry.
– I lied to my daughter and told her that the bath crayons were broken because I had JUST cleaned the bathtub.
– I dropped a baby book on my son’s head. My children should not be allowed near me.
– I knocked my daughter into the corner of a wall while I was carrying a load of laundry. Straight up just bulldozed her because I didn’t see her and I was rushing.
– I put my daughter in shoes that were 2 sizes too small while we were rushing to get out of the house.
– I then had her pick up all the sticks in the yard to help Daddy when really I was trying to wear her out. Yep, even the big ones. I later realized she probably could have poked an eye out.
– My solution to the above problem? I researched children’s safety glasses online.
– I pretended not to know that my son had a poopy diaper and waited a few minutes to change him because I knew Daddy was on the way. Welcome home!
I really learned a lot by keeping track of all this. First- I lie…A LOT. I also am a hazard to my kids and I suck at life. Anyone else have a Friday Failing?